Grin and Bear It
by The Crimson Wing
Summary: Lee was accustomed to holding his tongue, bearing the pain. Then he learned that there are times when you need to speak up for what you want. [LeeGaa]


**Story Genre:** Is bad a genre?

**Pairings:** Everywhere from here to there and back again

**Warnings:** Mild bashing to various parties (if you sorta squint), cliché, spoilerish I guess, and my inability to use the right form of 'bear' I do believe but I keep poking around and this seems to be the right one…Try not to judge me too harshly on that sense, ahhah…Oh, and un-beta'd!! As usual...

**Timeline:** All screwed up!

**Story Rating:** On a scale of 1 to 10, one being horrible and 10 being excellent? Negative 23

**Author Status:** Tired, way too tired to be doing this. Mildly more insane then usual…uh oh…Obsessing over Jiro Wang/Barbossa/Dilios/Kankuro/Lee. But what else is new?

**Note:** Thanks to all of you who poked me into writing some more. If you review, give me names and such of well done LeeGaa stories. I saw so many bad ones a month or more ago I haven't looked since.

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**_Grin and Bear It_**

Long ago, Rock Lee had learned to suck in his pride, grin, and bear the pain. That skill certainly hadn't come naturally, surfacing in his younger years to be reinforced by Maito Gai. There were reasons he hero worshipped the man after all, that wasn't a given by any means and never had been.

This skill's name had come to him through way of a conversation with Gai and Kakashi. Mid-day had been threatening upon the temperate hidden village and Gai, much to his young pupil's disbelief, had just finished his self imposed 500 cartwheel laps around the dwellings. It had looked humiliating and, just as Lee thought, people passing by giggled and cast furtive, snide looks at the exhausted Green Beast.

Finally, after a particularly loud gaggle of Genins passed by and Gai still did nothing, Lee swiveled to look at his mentor. "Sensei," he demanded, "why do you merely watch as people laugh?"

Surprised, Gai had taken a long time in forming a response. "People don't always accept certain things Lee and you've got to let some of it slide or you'll be picking fights wherever you go, which isn't a very wise, nor polite idea." He smiled, his grin showing none of the fatigue written in his body language, and pushed himself back to lean against the building' second story so the sliver of shade from the awning encompassed his form. "Besides, what doesn't kill us can only make us stronger!"

"Or cripple you permanently and leave you worse then dead for me to take care of," Kakashi had mumbled cynically, flipped a page in his book, and shifted to sprawl across his fellow Sensei's legs.

In the days leading up to that point, Lee had studied Kakashi's tones and come to conclude the one employed then was affectionate, maybe a little scolding. Satisfied, Lee had nodded his consent and sat back on his heels, tilting his head to one side and gazing upon Gai as he seemed to be wishing to say more.

"Kakashi, stop being so hip," Gai grumbled, the tiniest of smiles haunting his lips, before turning to Lee once more. "Most of the time you should grin and bear it Lee, that is the sign of maturity. Don't let others opinions get you down, for what you know in your heart is the most important!" He looked thoughtful again before adding, "Don't always let people walk all over you though."

Lee had been confused by the contradiction and showed it well with the singular, "Sensei?"

Gai had chuckled quietly and scratched the back of his neck, worrying it in a thoughtful manner. "Well, for instance something most precious to you is being taken away," Kakashi boredly raised his hand but had it slapped down by a pouting Gai, "If you know in your heart that that is not what is best…Fight for it. Verbally, physically, by any means possible to get it back."

Confused still, Lee arched a cynical brow. "Know in my heart?"

"You'll understand when it happens Lee," Kakashi had yawned from behind his book. "We all do."

That had been the end to that as, immediately afterwards, Gai had challenged Kakashi to a bout and the Sharingan Knight, with an odd sort of gleam to his features, had boredly declared 'wrestling' and dragged him away.

Lee had a feeling he was glad he hadn't gone to watch.

Now, some seven odd years later, Lee was starting to understand the contradiction that Gai had given him and the honor went to a certain redhead by the name of Gaara.

The young Kazekage had come to visit Konoha on a diplomatic trip that Temari had adamantly demanded he go on in person. So far the 'why' hadn't been elaborated on but it was certain that at least part of it was due to his lack of travel during his time as the Wind's ruler. In any case, Lee was still grateful. It wasn't often that he got to see Gaara as his vacation times were few and far in between and on the missions he was sent to Sunagakure for (which were becoming more and more frequent) he could hardly spend more then an hour with the leader, most of which was in the office during a debriefing.

On the day the red head arrived, Lee certainly hadn't been the first to notice, but he'd probably been the most unfortunate at the time. It had been during a particularly nasty sparring match with Neji when he'd spotted the mop of red, but more importantly, when he'd spotted _her_. He'd frozen so badly that he'd only half avoided his former teammates next move and had been smashed back into a tree.

After a quick apology to Neji (who gave him the oddest angry look when informed of his next destination but grudgingly nodded his agreement to go and see TenTen) Lee had rushed after the little group of three composed of Gaara, the girl, and his older brother.

Then he sat outside and waited for his comrades. Lee waited and waited and waited, thinking about the red head and what he was going to say, inwardly glowing, until finally, three hours later, the trio emerged, Kankuro talking to the girl he didn't know. Gaara walked in the lead, looking strained and nodding vaguely as if he weren't really there at that moment in time.

Lee had bound to his feet eagerly, mouth opening to shout a boisterous greeting, when his voice faltered and a familiar feeling shot through his gut like white lightning.

"Don't you agree Gaara?" The girl had shouted, rushing up and giving her Kazekage a broad, glittering smile. Lee noted that it closely resembled one of the expressions Sakura or Ino would have given to Sasuke.

Maybe that's why, when Gaara had spotted Lee and something caught between a smirk and a smile daunted his features, the Green Beast had run like the devil himself were hot on his heels.

Now, it was quiet.

Lee sat in a tree near the training grounds he'd once shared with the other members of Team Gai, watching the trees rustle with breeze as if in tune with his disquieted mood. The skies had darkened some time before then and he'd barely noticed, barely given thought to anything around him save the brush of wind and the occasional voice as it drifted by.

'That,' Lee reflected absently, 'was very rude. Gaara-kun probably believes I am mad at him. That is not true at all! When I see him next I will have to apologize and explain that I…That I…'

Why had he run? The young green beast had the uncomfortable notion that he knew.

'That I could not bear to see you with that woman.' Oh yeah, that would go over well. Lee sank his face into one palm and sighed in a tone far more miserable then it should have been.

"Gai sensei," he said miserably to the wind, "What do I do?"

Speeches drifted through his mind and the green beast let his head fall back, black locks in a mess about his face. He fingered them absently, the idle thought that he needed a trim floating through his mind as he contemplated his situation. He was in love, that much he could admit to himself. What of Gaara though? Once upon a time during one of his frequent visits the Kazekage had told him that he cared a lot about the Green Beast, but where did that lead?

Considering Gaara's heart wrenching past, Lee highly doubted even the red head knew which didn't help in the slightest! Not that it was Gaara's fault, certainly not, just that it would be easier were he to know himself. It was perfectly all right that he didn't.

Lee smiled faintly into the night's sky. That's what made him Gaara after all and Lee wouldn't change it for anything.

After a few more minutes of lounging in his tree, the Green Beast dropped to the ground and headed for home. The usual brisk walk was abandoned for a slow, leisurely trot and, so as to not have to greet his friends or appear rude by not doing so, he took a less traveled business road when he hit the leaf village.

It was relaxing, not having to put up his bouncy, overly cheerful façade. He emitted a sigh of content, scratched the back of his neck, and glanced to his left where a little coffee shop was still alight. Lee smiled faintly at the couples sitting by the window, drinking their orders and staring warmly at each other. It was cozy and made his stomach give a funny little lurch.

'Gaara…' The Green Beast thought somewhat mournfully. Then he briskly shook his head. This was no time to become depressed! He had to persevere, had to…had to…

Down the street came Gaara, looking mildly amused at something or other as the little brown haired woman at his side bounced eagerly. Something like hot coals slipped down into Lee's stomach and began to simmer. Anger, jealousy, sadness, perhaps not one, maybe all, swirled up in his veins and he had to fight down the urge to run screaming as he forced himself to walk on, berating himself as he did so.

Why hadn't he chosen the normal route? The only threat would have been seeing Neji or possibly Miss Hinata, but the former couldn't care less and the latter would hardly notice his odd state of being. Why was he so angry anyway? It wasn't as if he were dating Gaara, despite the fact that he…wanted…to…

Lee stopped in his tracks, liquid onyx eyes widening a little. The words of his sensei and his mate raced over and over again in his mind.

_**"Don't always let people walk all over you though."**_

He watched the girl giggle faintly and Gaara shake his head.

_**"If you know in your heart that that is not what is best…Fight for it. Verbally, physically, by any means possible to get it back."**_

The Green Beast sucked in a breath, so sharp that his ribs gave a twinge of protest. He felt suddenly…lightheaded, swaying over a step and leaning against a building's wall for support as his mind raced. Was now such a time? How did he know that he was best for Gaara?

In all honesty, Lee didn't know. Yet…

Watching the pair brought a stark pain to his chest, caught his breathing, and he felt as if he were dying, drowning, lost. Even if it wasn't best… Even if it ended in disaster… He had to try. After all, he was Rock Lee! If his good friend Naruto, his comrade in the title of 'failure' could rise above such mediocre things, then who was to say that he could not? He COULD and would talk to Sabaku no Gaara about his feelings, even if it broke him up inside when he was rejected.

That thought made Lee pause, a wince flickering over his features. The name 'Sakura' rang in his mind as strong as it did every day but he shoved it down with a vengeance. He had changed since then and done things right this time around. Gaara and he knew one another, had for years. This was all right.

Lee took that first step forward and knew he couldn't go back.

"Gaara…" He said quietly and the red head turned towards him, stopping mid-step.

"Lee," was the calm response, though a flicker of something flickered behind jade eyes. "Are you all right?"

The green beast walked briskly away from his leaning post at the wall, politely inclining his head to the woman he didn't know before he focused solely on the red head. "Ah, yes Gaara-kun. It is just that I have something of relative importance that I need to speak to you about if you have a moment."

It felt like time was dragging on very slowly for Lee. His skin was jumping with nerves and he had to fight the urge to fidget as he stood, awaiting the red head's leisure. He watched the dark rimmed orbs flutter briefly to the woman as if sizing up her reaction, then settle back on himself and was surprised to see the aqua bleeding into the jade, one of his more relaxed colors. A tentative smile, just barely noticeable even to those who knew him, curved up the corners of Gaara's lips and he nodded faintly.

"Excuse me Matsuri."

To say the least, Lee was surprised when the brunette backed out so easily, even smiled at him, but he accepted that as a good sign and returned the gesture. Gaara led him a few yards down the street and partially down an alley before he stopped, turned his back to a wall, and looked at Lee.

At that moment Lee realized he had absolutely no idea how he was going to go about this.

Oops.

Feeling incredibly naked, Lee couldn't fight the squirm then. His hands clasped together before him, eyes hooding a bit as they lowered to the ground, a blush swirling upwards to touch his cheeks. "I am sorry to say that I am not well prepared in how to go about this," Lee murmured sheepishly, "But I found that if I do not at least tell you then I will burst."

The red head would never know how unendingly grateful Lee was when he only nodded patiently.

"Gai Sensei and Kakashi Sensei once told me that it is best that, when the situation is fruitless, I should just grin and bear the circumstances and I still hold true to those words," he chuckled a little, "It has indeed saved me from many violent situations." He gnawed over his next words, large brows furrowed a little in thought before he went on. "However, they also told me that in certain circumstances I must reach out for that which I desire, even if it may cause problems for other people. They told me that I would know when this time came."

Time for the moment of truth…Lee's gaze fluttered up from eyeing the ground to rest on the shorter of the pair.

"That time, I believe, is now, Gaara-kun."

Gaara watched him quietly, no comment befalling his lips, but a series of things were racing behind his eyes, too quickly for Lee to decipher them. After a long moment the Kazekage tentatively nodded, settling back more firmly against the wall of the alley as if in preparation for terrible news.

"When we first met, Gaara-kun," Lee started, nerves a little frayed, "I was not sure what to think of you. Certainly after our…incident," he noticed Gaara wince but pushed on, "I did not care for you very much. After all, you had crippled me!" Lee's voice rose with exasperation, but he forged on, voice softening a bit in memory, "After our battle with Kimimaro, when you so bravely stood up for myself and the village, I began to care for you. You were one of my dearest friends and, to this day, you still are."

He swallowed what felt like sandpaper. The difficult part was coming up. Surprisingly though he did not need to pause in his speech and he imagined that was a good thing. If he'd stopped, he probably would have choked.

"After Chiyo-sama resurrected you, I realized how worried I had been and felt a fierce…anger at not having been there more for you." Lee frowned a little. The thought still angered him. "During my visits to Sunagakure, sometime around the beginning of the last two years I realized it was not anger, but a jealousy that Naruto was able to protect you so."

A smile curved Lee's features, raw and real, and he let his head fall to one side, overlong bangs falling into his eyes. Gaara looked surprised, to say the least.

"Gaara," he said quietly, but did not approach the red head, "I am in love with you."

The red head stiffened violently but Lee did not move to touch him. Oh how he knew so much better then that. Instead he held his ground, just within arms length but hopefully not close enough to scare the easily spooked Kazekage. He watched Gaara in silence, prayed he had not overstepped himself as the red head stood straight, looking like he was going to run.

But he didn't.

Instead he surprised Lee, stepping forward so close that there was less than an inch separating them. Gaara looked up into the openly shocked expression, studied it as if he were searching Lee's very soul, waiting to find the truth (or perhaps the lie) in the circular, obsidian orbs. Apparently he found something correct as he, carefully as if afraid to break the Green Beast, put his arms around the taller of the pair and hid in his collar bone.

Lee recovered from his surprise quickly (a good thing considering the bold move on the part of the contact shy Gaara) and placed his arms about the gourd wearing red head as best as he could. They stood like that for a moment and he felt the Kazekage's shaking, heard the faint hiss of sand as it uncertainly swirled and twisted inside it's container, but didn't say anything. He could tell by the extended silence that Gaara was composing himself to say something and he didn't want to break the thoughtfulness so instead he simply stood, holding the red head and feeling like he was on top of the planet.

Finally Gaara spoke and Lee was almost humbled by the fact that his voice was perfectly calm. The Green Beast could probably never do that. "I don't know if I know how to love," Gaara started out and Lee, who had been awaiting the blow, didn't show his flinch. It was expected. "But," it was then that a soft waver entered his voice and the red head drew away a bit to look up at Lee, his face wrought with an almost childlike expression, "I want to try."

"Gaara-kun…?" Lee asked uncertainly, for there was a hesitance in the sentence, like he wished to say more and indeed the rest came rushing out as if he'd bottled it up repeatedly.

"I think I care about you, at least as much as I know how. I hold you in as high regard as I do my sister and brother but in a…different sense." A blush raged on the Kazekage's face and, were the situation not so serious, Lee would have laughed (or kissed him. Or both). "I'm not sure how to describe it," he growled after a moment, frustration lacing his tone.

The Green Beast smiled, hesitantly reached up to brush his fingertips across the pale expanse of skin that was covered in a layer of sand. He didn't voice his surprise when, after a moment, the grains dropped away to slither back into their gourd, but he gave a smile to show that he was more then happy with the response to his touch.

"I understand Gaara," he said, leaning forward and gingerly brushing his lips across the kanji on the Kazekage's forehead. Gaara went rigid and Lee, realizing himself, hissed and stepped backwards. "Sorry-" he started but the reproachful look the red head gave him made him go quiet at once.

"I won't break," the Kazekage scolded, looking away as the red began to creep up his pale features again, "Just… give me some warning next time."

Lee was elated, naturally. "Yes Gaara."

As the red head turned to move out of the alley Lee stopped him with a ginger hand on his shoulder. The sand hissed and rattled but quieted after a ginger surging of chakra, aqua eyes that were slowly hardening to jade once more swiveling back to the dark haired male.

"Who is that woman you are with?" Lee inquired. He couldn't help himself.

Gaara looked curious. "One of my old students."

Relief, elation, and a mixture of several other emotions flooded through Lee and he had to physically stop himself from pouncing on his…boyfriend maybe?…well, whatever they were now. "May I hug you?" He asked, feeling ridiculous about asking but not willing to spook the red head.

When Gaara nodded faintly and Lee hurled his arms around the smaller male, the Green Beast realized just how glad he was that he had realized when to not just 'grin and bear it'.

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DONE! Un-beta'd. Probably worse then negative twenty-three. Review anyway. :D

I've been thinking- would a blush show up under the sand armor? I say yes because, think about it- it shows all of his facial expression changes, why not? Gaw. Opinions?


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